New Piece! I think I'm going to start doing these like once a week, for practice and whatnot. As always comments and advice are always welcome.
He said this is what I get for being his daughter
Blood stains on tablecloths and
Dragging my mother down the hall because
She changed the locks
He said I got to watch.
Lessons learned so I wouldn't have carpet burns.
This is how you keep daddy happy,
You always let him have his turn
To play
toying with my innocent flesh, disturbing its purity
Fondling my innocence with fingers of deceit
Bursting through my somber dreams
Clouding it with nightmares
Ignoring the Blood because
To him, it was a right of passage
I would always be his.
He said this is what I get for being his daughter.
Special prayers he could only kiss
Under there, underneath underwear
Engraved in me certain milestones I wasn't suppose to experience
Until beyond puberty.
Taken away the unexpectancy
Justifiable because I didn't know any better
But he did
And my mother would reprimand
What could she do?
Wife against husband
I got to hear scream
Absorb the exchange of obscenities
Gleeful ignorance rotting away to reveal
the real world
The daily life for daddy's little girl
I deserved it
I deserve it
How could i possibly deserve a life like this?
If I serve it, give service
then maybe daddy won't premeditate these hits
He said this is what I get for being his daughter
Cozy two-story prison
complete with punched in walls
Broken dishes
Forced stair falls
And hopeless wishes
Domestic violence calls, cps visits and neighbors turning the other cheek
All sold separately
The perfect family
I got to witness truth being violated by the justice system, systematically.
But its not over
He may be my dad, I his daughter
But that still leaves room for a father
The Father
And this is what I get for being his daughter
A way out
another day to smile
Cup runneth over with blessing because I was His child
Open doors, relief from despair
strength and lessons
Joy in times of trouble
Him there to pick up the pieces
When my life started to crumble
Forgiveness, understanding, wisdom
Favor
And the greatest of these,
Love, Eternal Life
I got to live out pain so
I can know what true happiness is
And i will always be Daddy's Girl.
Although this is very good, the father in me is disturbed by this. I will never understand how a father could even think to do something like you described so well here.
ReplyDeleteLike I said, very good, but disturbing nonetheless.